“The sight of the goods of others increases the feeling of the bads themselves.” – António Vieira
I still have the frequent temptation to splurge on my successes. Less than before, but still do it with the same energy that I try to hide my failures. I do so for two reasons: to feed my ego (stupidly by the way) and to provide inspiration to those who are around me. I think that if I show my victories that will thrill my workgroup, and if Ishow losses that will make them discouraged.
What is certain is that, obviously, there is no valid reason to try to show who I am not, or only a small portion of the truth. I had already noticed that, for many, my successes caused discouragement while my failings made them recover morale. And had to come António Vieira, all the way from the seventeenth century, for me to understand why.
The view of the successes of others causes an involuntary and unconscious envy that reminds us of our own failures.
This memory is often what we lacked to let our arms fall. We deem ourselves losers in some implied competition.
After becoming aware of this, I noticed myself that this phenomenon is shown in me in the same way. Not always but often, the view of the success of my friends makes me sad because it was not mine and emerges in me a riple of envy.
So this post today is about this involuntary envy that can lead you to discouragement.
The idea is to turn it into productive envy and genuine joy for the successes of others.
Can you do that? Overcoming your instinctive reactions and consciously change your feeling? Look at the successes of your friends and be happy for them even while dosing the decision to return to your plan, roll up your sleeves and do what you know needs to be done?
If so all the successes of others will be yours too.
Come closer to them, learn how it was e dupicate what you can and want to dublicate.
If you feel jealous, sad or depressed by their successes, get away from your friends that succeed because you will try to bring them back to your level and it’s not fair to anyone.